Pep-Talk to Myself

Sometimes I look down at my growing belly and think to myself, “Oh my gosh, I am pregnant again.” It’s not like it’s a bad thing, but sometimes I wonder how in the world I am going to do this again? I know that I CAN do it, because I have Jesus and I know that He will be my strength when I have none left. But that doesn’t stop the old, pessimistic side of Katie from revealing her ugly head as she tries to ruin the joy of this perfect gift that God is creating in her. I tend to default to the memories of the difficult things instead of the memories of things that were wonderful. Are we all like that? I know I can’t be the only one who battles this.

I’ve heard it said that sometimes it is good to list out the pro’s and con’s of something in order to help clear your mind of worry or to help make a decision. The decision I need to make is whether or not to entertain these pessimistic thoughts that cross my mind about the baby and its arrival. I already know what the outcome will be, but since I am sitting at work and really don't want to do anything else, here it goes…

The things that I am dreading:
1) The anxiety of going into labor and wondering what is going to happen next
2) Being a human pin-cushion while in the hospital
3) The slow recovery after having a caesarian
4) Engorgement. Ow. Ow. OW!
5) Lack of sleep
6) Being thrown-up on, pooped on and peed on, on a regular basis
7) The possibility of getting new stretch marks
8) The possibility of hemorrhoids
9) Cleaning the belly button/umbilical cord thingy (gag)
10) Spending an arm and a leg on diapers and formula
11) The possibility of suffering with post-partum depression again
12) The hospital bill
13) Did I mention that I can kiss my sleeping in on the weekends GOODBYE?

The things that I am looking forward to:
1) Seeing him/her for the first time
2) Holding him/her for the first time
3) Breathing in deeply that baby smell – the good one ;)
4) The feeling of unconditional love every time I see him/her
5) Fitting back into my favorite pair of jeans
6) Simply watching Brandon interact with his first-born
7) Getting to see Caden be a big brother
8) Hearing baby belly-laughs again
9) Taking naps every chance I get instead of doing chores
10) Having him/her fall asleep in my arms
11) Listening to “ahh” & “coo” sounds after bath time
12) Dressing him/her up in adorable baby outfits
13) Getiing smiled at every time your baby sees you
14) Hearing “mama” for the first time
15) Did I mention the baby smell?!

So obviously, all of the things that I am dreading will have been more than worth it once I get to start checking off my second list! So snap out of it Katie, and think on these things instead!

John 16:21 - When a woman is giving birth, she has sorrow because her hour has come, but when she has delivered the baby, she no longer remembers the anguish, for joy that a human being has been born into the world.

Psalm 127:3 - Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD, the fruit of the womb a reward.

James 1:17 - Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change.

Jeremiah 1:5 - Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, and before you were born I consecrated you…

Psalm 139:13 - For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb.