24 Weeks

As I write this blog, my iPhone's ‘What to Expect’ App says that I have 16 weeks to go and that Samuel is as big as an ear of corn (approx. 8.5 in, 1.5 lbs)!  The strength in which he kicks me sometimes leads me to believe otherwise.  He’s got to be at least 3 lbs with the power behind those kicks.  A few weeks ago I posted a note on my Twitter that said that I thought Samuel might have been “Sweating To The Oldies” because he had been kicking/punching me simultaneously in every which direction that afternoon.  Maybe they were just jumping-jacks.  Who knows? 

There have been a number of things that I have been wanting to blog about this past couple of weeks, but I have been pre-occupied reading Harry Potter.  I can’t seem to put them down!  (It's my first time to read them if that makes me any less of a nerd.)  Anyways, I have forgotten about most of the stuff I wanted to blog about so I think I will just make a list to help jog my memory.  Lists are nice to read on blogs anyhow.

1.       I have come to the conclusion that maternity jeans are not my friend.  The most recent pair I purchased are the only jeans that actually stay on my hips but they are so tight around my waist that my belly hangs over the top of them.  When I wear them I feel like I resemble what a muffin top would look like after coming out of an oven when you’ve poured too much batter into the mold.  I don’t know…  Maybe I just haven’t found the right pair.  Maybe the only good pairs of maternity jeans out there are the ones that I refuse to even try on because they are $80.  The other two pairs that I’ve purchased (which looked alright on in the dressing room) turned out becoming my nemeses because they just won’t stay on my waist!  Granted, they may be more comfortable but there isn’t anything cute about a prego woman who is constantly pulling her pants up with one hand and pushing her cart with the other while walking down the aisles in the grocery store. 

2.       There needs to be a law passed that protects pregnant women from the infamous unwanted belly rubs.  For me, it’s like this:  If I have never given you a hug (and I hug a lot of people) then I would prefer you keep your hands to yourself – or at least respect my personal bubble enough to ask me first.

3.       Brandon had a dream when we first found out that I was pregnant that I gave birth to a bunny. I had a dream just last week that I gave birth to a fawn.  Random?  Yes, absolutely.

4.       About a week ago, I suffered for about 8 days or so with these unbearably itchy red bumps on my belly.  It was the kind of itch you get when scratching only intensifies the itch.  Lotions didn’t even suppress it.  There were two nights where I woke up suddenly fighting the urge to scratch, but gave in to the temptation.  I guess I was scratching frantically enough that it woke up Brandon and he had to force me to stop.  I freaked myself out the next morning after I had googled “itchy pregnant belly” online because apparently, there are all kinds of rashes that you can get during pregnancy that range from being harmless to the baby to being deadly.  I had to wait a few days before my next doctor’s appointment so I called them to inform them of what was going on and they suggested trying Hydrocortisone cream instead of different lotions.  It worked like magic.  Lesson learned: Consult the doctor before you consult the internet and possibly diagnose yourself with some rare, pregnancy-related disease. 

5.       I recently had a very special moment with my sweet mother-in-law during a jewelry party, of all places.  Since Brandon was adopted, she never got to experience what it feels like when a baby kicks your belly so I had been praying that little Samuel would kick while we were together that evening…and he did!  I will never forget the look of wonder and joy on her face when she felt her grandson move for the very first time.  Tears rolled down her face and she said proudly, “That’s my grandson in there!”

6.       Had an appointment last week and thank the Lord, everything is looking good!  I have gained 15 pounds so far and if this pregnancy is anything like my pregnancy with Caden, I have about 35 more pounds to go.  YIKES.  I am already avoiding my reflection in the mirror when I get in and out of the shower because I can’t handle the ugly truth of what pregnancy does to my thutt (Definition: Noun – Part of the human body where your butt meets your thighs.)  That being said, I can’t even imagine what my poor body will look like after gaining 35 more pounds.  *tear*  However, I welcome any change that needs to happen to my body in order to bring Samuel healthily into this world.  He is SO worth every squat that I will have to do in order to look half-way decent in a bikini again.  

7.       Brandon and I really need to go and register at Babies R Us.  I get asked if we have registered at least once a week. 

8.       I think I may be the only person in the world that gets cramps in her feet during pregnancy instead of in her legs.  Every website I have searched says nothing about foot cramps during pregnancy, only leg cramps.  They are the weirdest cramps too… All of a sudden, my toes will slowly start contorting into these un-natural positions and the only way I can remedy it is to force my toes back in to place.  But the second I let go, they go right back to where they were before I forced them back to normal.  It’s bizarre.  I love my husband because he has discovered that soaking my deformed looking foot in hot water helps gets my foot back to normal much quicker than my remedy was.

9.       I love what pregnancy has done for my hair.

10.   Caden strolled into the house the other day and just about made my month by what I overheard him say.  It was sweet and funny at the same time.  The dialogue went something like this:  (Garage door closes.)  Caden says, “Where’s mommy?”  Brandon replies, “I don’t know son, go sit down and get ready to do your homework.”  (Chairs shuffle around.)  Caden says something else that I couldn’t hear and Brandon responds something back that I didn’t hear either.  Caden shouts, “Where’s that pretty girl with a big stomach?!”  That is probably the only time that I will have had a huge smile on my face after my child refers to my stomach as “big.” 

And now, here is the most recent belly pic:

Brandon took it just a few days ago!  My little Samuel is growing so fast!

And here is a picture of the New Balance tennis shoes that I simply could not resist buying last weekend at Second Childhood.  They were only $8, how could I NOT  buy them?

Aren’t they ADORABLE?!!!  They have already disappeared once and right about when I noticed they weren’t where I had set them down, Brandon walks in the room with them with a huge smile on his face said, “I can’t wait to see these on Samuel!”  Neither can I babe, neither can I.

How to pray for Haiti

A lot of times when I want to pray for someone or something, I can’t find the words. I found this on my church’s website and thought that someone out there might find it just as useful as I did.

• Pray for those who have been affected by the quake – people who are trapped in rubble or homeless, those who are hungry or injured or traumatized.

• Pray for all those who are involved in the relief effort, that the Lord would give them strength to deal with the awful conditions they are facing.

• Pray for those who are trying to organize people and resources to assist with the relief efforts.

• Pray that God would stir up his people to respond with the love of Christ to help people in desperate need.

My sweet son, who is 5, remembers Haiti in his prayers almost every night. He either asks for God to give the people of Haiti new hearts since theirs have been broken, for God to watch over them since they are sleeping in the streets, for God to give them new wives since a lot of people lost theirs, for God to give them food since all of it was smashed, and for strength.

Hearing his heart for people who are hurting so badly right now, makes me wish that the Haitians knew that even in Katy, TX a child is lifting them up in prayer. Maybe, if even for just one moment, it might let someone feel the arms of God wrapped around them.

And don’t you know that God loves the prayers of children as much as He loves adult prayers even when we can’t find the “right” words…

Haiti.

I am still trying to wrap my mind around the ever-worsening horror in Haiti. My heart is sick over the unimaginable tragedies there.

I came across a blog written by a missionary couple that has been serving in Haiti for a few years. The link below is the husband’s firsthand account of what he experienced during the earthquake. If this doesn’t break your heart enough to either make a donation toward aid for Haiti or get on your knees and pray, I don’t know what will:

http://rollingsinhaiti.wordpress.com/2010/01/13/earthquake-day-in-port-au-prince/

I cannot even begin to imagine what this man must be dealing with emotionally. Not only does Haiti need our prayers, but so does everyone involved in search and rescue.

I was discussing donations with a friend of mine and she mentioned that some of her Haitian friends living in South Florida have said that they worry that some of the smaller charities out there collecting money won’t even make it to the needed areas. Let’s pray that the following charities are good stewards over the money they receive. I have read that Compassion is already in active operation toward aid for Haiti and so is World Vision. You can also get on the official Red Cross website and give online. Go to Redcross.org and look for "donate" and choose "International Response Fund." You'll see Haiti specified there. If any of you are like me and financially strapped right now, and looking for a way to make a vital contribution that won't put you further in the hole, perhaps this ready option might work:

 Text "HAITI" to 90999 to donate $10 to Red Cross relief efforts. It will be charged on your cell phone bill. How easy is that?!

When I think about the thousands of people that are still alive but trapped, or the parents who are desperately searching for their missing children, or the scared - now homeless - children searching for their parents, my heart breaks into a million pieces. I can’t even imagine what it would be like to go outside and 60% of Houston be completely flattened. How overwhelmed and helpless everyone must feel!

I am going to pray my heart out for these people and everything in me hopes that you will too. I wish there was more that we could do, but I know that God esteems our intercessory prayers and that prayer is SO much more powerful than we understand it to be.

UPDATE: I just read on cnn.com that the Red Cross has already raised $3 million in just over 24 hours through their text messaging campaign. Every little bit HELPS!

It's a BOY!

And we have already decided on a name for the little guy! 

Samuel Allen Wilkerson

“Sam” has been Brandon’s (maternal) grandfather’s nickname since he was a child and “Allen” was a dear friend of ours who passed away a few years ago from cancer.  Both gentleman are/were such positive, Godly influences in Brandon’s life and we are very proud to name our son in their honor.

I must admit that when we found out that we were having a little boy, I was a little sad at first.  I think mainly because I knew how badly Brandon wanted a girl.  He prayed for it every night.  But you know what? A week ago I heard a guest pastor deliver a sermon at our church and he said this, “Our greatest disappointments are God’s divine appointments.”  Those exact words are what rang through my head and even prompted me to pray and ask God’s forgiveness for my initial reaction to finding out the gender of our child.  How could I even be the slightest bit sad or disappointed when I know in my heart that all gifts that come from my Father in heaven are perfect? (James 1:17)  God’s plans are greater than anything I could ever imagine, and I trust that He gifted Brandon and I with exactly what He planned for us to have together before either of us were even born and I wouldn’t trade that for anything!  Besides, when I was pregnant with Caden I was hoping for a girl as well and I am so happy that I got him instead.  He is a blessing to us (almost) everyday. :)

Brandon was so excited to see his baby moving around during the sonogram and wouldn’t you know it, we even got a little wave from him!  It was amazing.  His little hand was opened all the way like he was ready to give us a high five, and then he made a fist and opened it right back up before our very eyes!  The technician said, “Awww he just waved hello to you!  How special…” Special, indeed!  I was amazed at how much he has grown since the first ultrasound we had back when I was only 10 weeks along in the pregnancy.  Now he is so much more defined!  We could make out his spine, and of course his arms, legs and face.  It was even more amazing to see his little heart beating.  We could see the different chambers and everything!  Other than that, he looked pretty squished in there.  And oh my goodness his feet looked huge!  I have a feeling he is going to be very long…just like his daddy.  

The pictures she got weren’t very good…it was so much clearer seeing it live. But here is the best one:

We are planning on saving up some cash so that we can do the 3D ultrasound in a few months to get better quality pictures of Samuel.  They recommend that you do it around 28-34 weeks gestation for the best results, so that puts us anywhere between 3/8 – 4/19!  I can’t WAIT!!!  It’s $195 and the package includes “8-9 frame worthy pictures and a 10 minute video of the baby in utero.”  Insurance doesn’t cover it, but I don’t think it will be too hard to save up for that!!!

I am a little overdue on my picture for this month, so here it is finally:

So a couple of days ago Brandon was finally able to feel Samuel kicking!  I wish it wasn’t pitch black in our room when it happened so I could have seen his face, but I could hear the gigantic smile in his voice as he said with great excitement, “Was that him!?”

We can’t wait to hold him in our arms! 

(Im)patiently waiting...

My dear friend Janet likes to refer to our appointment next Monday as "the one where we find out if the baby has a hamburger or a hot dog." LOL  Brandon and I are both SO excited for this appointment.  People have been asking me if I have a feeling of what the outcome may be, but I am clueless.  With Caden, I swore up and down that I was having a girl.  I had dreams that I was having a girl, I craved foods that apparently women crave when they have a girl and there were several other things which pointed me to believe that I was without a doubt having a girl.  My reaction to the doctor telling me that I was having a boy was, "REALLY?"  This pregnancy is different because not only do I not want to get myself all psyched to believe that I am having a girl and then be sad if they tell me otherwise, but I simply have no idea.

I have decided that I am going to be happy no matter what the sex of this baby is.  God knows what is best for us and so I will rejoice and be glad in whatever He gives us!

P.S.  I think that our cat Rizzo doesn't like it when I am not giving her my full attention and I have proof!  The second that I sat down and opened my macbook, she laid right on top of me and I could barely even see the screen.

After I got the picture above, I moved her so that she could lay next to me instead.  As I started typing the first few words, she took her paw and gently placed it on top of my hand.  Is this not simply ridiculous?

Pep-Talk to Myself

Sometimes I look down at my growing belly and think to myself, “Oh my gosh, I am pregnant again.” It’s not like it’s a bad thing, but sometimes I wonder how in the world I am going to do this again? I know that I CAN do it, because I have Jesus and I know that He will be my strength when I have none left. But that doesn’t stop the old, pessimistic side of Katie from revealing her ugly head as she tries to ruin the joy of this perfect gift that God is creating in her. I tend to default to the memories of the difficult things instead of the memories of things that were wonderful. Are we all like that? I know I can’t be the only one who battles this.

I’ve heard it said that sometimes it is good to list out the pro’s and con’s of something in order to help clear your mind of worry or to help make a decision. The decision I need to make is whether or not to entertain these pessimistic thoughts that cross my mind about the baby and its arrival. I already know what the outcome will be, but since I am sitting at work and really don't want to do anything else, here it goes…

The things that I am dreading:
1) The anxiety of going into labor and wondering what is going to happen next
2) Being a human pin-cushion while in the hospital
3) The slow recovery after having a caesarian
4) Engorgement. Ow. Ow. OW!
5) Lack of sleep
6) Being thrown-up on, pooped on and peed on, on a regular basis
7) The possibility of getting new stretch marks
8) The possibility of hemorrhoids
9) Cleaning the belly button/umbilical cord thingy (gag)
10) Spending an arm and a leg on diapers and formula
11) The possibility of suffering with post-partum depression again
12) The hospital bill
13) Did I mention that I can kiss my sleeping in on the weekends GOODBYE?

The things that I am looking forward to:
1) Seeing him/her for the first time
2) Holding him/her for the first time
3) Breathing in deeply that baby smell – the good one ;)
4) The feeling of unconditional love every time I see him/her
5) Fitting back into my favorite pair of jeans
6) Simply watching Brandon interact with his first-born
7) Getting to see Caden be a big brother
8) Hearing baby belly-laughs again
9) Taking naps every chance I get instead of doing chores
10) Having him/her fall asleep in my arms
11) Listening to “ahh” & “coo” sounds after bath time
12) Dressing him/her up in adorable baby outfits
13) Getiing smiled at every time your baby sees you
14) Hearing “mama” for the first time
15) Did I mention the baby smell?!

So obviously, all of the things that I am dreading will have been more than worth it once I get to start checking off my second list! So snap out of it Katie, and think on these things instead!

John 16:21 - When a woman is giving birth, she has sorrow because her hour has come, but when she has delivered the baby, she no longer remembers the anguish, for joy that a human being has been born into the world.

Psalm 127:3 - Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD, the fruit of the womb a reward.

James 1:17 - Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change.

Jeremiah 1:5 - Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, and before you were born I consecrated you…

Psalm 139:13 - For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb.

Nothing Much

The most exciting thing that has happened lately is that it snowed in Houston last week! It was beautiful while it lasted. Here are the few pictures I took. I spent most of my time enjoying watching it fall outside from my bedroom window as I sat in my cozy, warm bed.

Okay, enough of that, let's talk about the little one on the way. God willing, we find out whether we're having a boy or a girl on January 4! Since we are so anxious to know, it seems like everyday just d r a g s. Or maybe it just seems that way because I am pregnant? Anyhow, we are hoping so badly that it's a girl. I will even confess to specifically praying for a girl, as silly as it may sound. I mean, a baby is a gift from God no matter what the sex is, but I can't stop thinking about how fun it would be to put little bows in her hair and buy her little pink frou-frou dresses to wear! All that being said, if we do end out having a boy we will be just as happy for the baby's arrival because no matter what our desires are, I know and trust that God always gives perfect gifts and knows what is best for us...so boy or girl, we will be praising God when this baby arrives!

I failed to remember to take a belly pic on the first of December, but it's better to be late than never, right? Here it is:

Oh my gosh, I feel like the belly has doubled in size since last months pic. Yikes. I am scared of what it will look like at the end of May when the baby is due. Brandon is 6'4"and I am only 5'6" so please pray for my belly's sake!

Before I go, I am going to answer the question that I get the most...

"How are you feeling?"

-TIRED.

-I never got morning sickness, but I have a super sense of smell now and it keeps me away from things that I used to enjoy. As tragic as it is, chocolate is not something I crave anymore. It doesn't smell bad or anything, I just don't want it.

-I don't have any strange cravings but if I think about a bean burrito from Taco Bell or a chicken sandwich from Chick-fil-A long enough, I MUST have it, and I must have it NOW.

-I have this constant pain in my aaaaaa left leg. It's right where my thigh bone meets my hips. It hurts the most a night. (Anyone know what could be causing this or how to make it go away?)

-I have been having very vivid, random dreams even though I toss and turn all night. I am thinking about getting one of those pregnancy pillows. Apparently they are supposed to make sleeping more comfortable for those of us who are 'with child'.

-Oh, and I am gassier than ever - if some of you can even imagine that. LOL. Seriously, I will eat one of those little candy canes and burp discreetly for like 10 minutes. It's ridiculous.